It"s Been a Year...

As the title says it’s been a year since I’ve been able to find the time to update anything here. I’ll ignore that half of last year was wasted building projects for some I shouldn’t have. It’s probably also a bad thing that I’m a very hands on type of person who happens to be a bit OCD when it comes to my own projects.

I just can’t bring myself to grab someone else’s templates for web designs, or use stock photos for book covers and design projects. It feels like cheating to me, and trying to use someone else’s work as my own. Although I’ve also noticed that in everyone’s rush to get things done quickly, the quality of certain things is not something I’d feel comfortable using.

With that said, my new years resolution for 2015 was to stop working for free. It’s hard enough balancing time when you’re doing your own projects without payment and hoping they’ll pay off at a later date. It’s a risk creatives and entrepreneurs all take with their time.

For the last few years, I’ve taken those risks with time, but on projects other than my own. This not only put me further and further behind on finishing my own projects but I’ve also come to realize that for the many that ask others to invest their time, there’s very little incentive for them to put in any work of their own as they have their steady jobs with paychecks coming in. If the project fails, they’re still secure in their living. For those like myself though, the feeling’s completely different in ways I’m sure one can imagine.

With that said, here’s what’s been completed since I made that resolution, and what I have planned for the coming months:

Books and Writing

I finally finished the second Bewitching book at the end of January and I’m about to start the third book. I’m hoping to have the third book finished by the end of this year. So that’s the great news on that front, along with the fact that the first book is about to break a million reads. From what I’ve heard I also have both Bewitching books, and possibly my French Riviera story featured on Wattpad’s new After Dark app.

Hopefully I can also find the time to go through the first two books and re-edit them, fixing typos, etc. I’m really crossing my fingers that by the summer I can have them both cleaned up enough that I feel confident in self publishing them on Amazon.

I also had a few webisodes I’d like to write, which falls into the acting and filmmaking categories too. The one I’m most excited about an idea called On Set, and the second is a web series entitled Singlesville. I’m still bouncing around ideas for both, but I have a general concept in the direction I’d like to go with them. The biggest limiting factor though is knowing who’ll show up and who I can rely upon for shooting them. That makes them a bit difficult to write but I’ll figure it out….somehow.

Web Design and Programming

I’ll likely be removing the web design and programming categories from this blog. It just doesn’t seem to fit with the more creative stuff. I’m thinking the best option will be to move them over to the BlackDoorMedia domain I own. While I’ve rethought the idea for that domain over and over again after some setbacks, I think it’d be best to go with the original concept I had for it. That includes offering video, photography, and web design services, along with tips for optimizing websites and building plugins. I’ll still be cross posting some of that here, but most of the programming information will be posted there.

Since I’ve finished the second Bewitching book back in January, I have used the break from writing to code a few plugins of my own. Anyone that’s frequented this site will notice the new share links. I removed Shareaholic share buttons due to the massive amount of code they used which slowed the site, along with a few other issues I had with them. The share buttons now are ones I created, that load along with the page. They’re also integrated with the Yoast plugin I use for images when shared to networks. Anyone sharing from here will notice the large images it now grabs for Facebook, Google+, etc. And best of all, it’s all written where one line of code will integrate all the files into the template once the folders loaded.

I’ve also taken the time to redo the SEO on this website and update it to HTML5, which I’ve held off on doing for a while. Finally, the largest part of the last month or two was spent building a slide show plugin for WordPress. While I liked a few of the plugins I had set up, some contained poorly written code, or were extremely bulky in the code they added. I’m hoping to turn the one I integrated directly into the template for this site into a plugin that uses multiple templates for other WordPress users after I work out a few small bugs.

On the “to do” I have to find some time to update The Bewitching website. Designing a nice looking, dark website is not easy, and I’m really not happy with how the current one looks. I’ll be doing that while also building the Black Door Media site.

Finally, I’d like to finish the Fit and Fashionable I started last year. The majority of the programming is done and uploaded, and there are several other updates already finished on the localhost. This is another one I’m looking forward to seeing finished, especially since it means I can interview some of my favorite Wattpad authors and friends.

Film/Acting and Photography

As I mentioned in the writing section, I have a few ideas for web series. I had already written several episodes of Singlesville a little over a year ago and then lost a bunch of the scripts when the computer I was using was stolen along with the backup drive. I’m kind of on the fence about trying to rewrite them, although I also have a few new ideas for it should I choose to pick it up again.

What I’m more excited for is writing On Set. I picture it being similar to The Office, but based on an indie filmmaker team, making it easy to switch out different actors for each episode each week depending on what they’re shooting. I had a great talk with someone last week about funny ideas, and that talk not only inspired a few more episode ideas but also a nice way the web series could be used as a marketing and advertising tool. Being shot like The Office would also make the work in post go a bit quicker.

I think the biggest obstacle I’ve come across with shooting any of these ideas tends to be getting people together to actually shoot the scenes. This also makes it difficult to write because you don’t want to write a significant character into the script and find out the person you’re thinking of casting can’t be relied upon. In which case I tend to start trying to limit who’s important in the story, and by the end the story feels so watered down that I lose interest. I’m hoping to find a nice, small group of people who maybe that won’t happen with so I can have several episodes on tape by the end of the summer.

For filming, I would also still would like to get the trailer shot for The Bewitching. Still waiting for schedules to clear up for that, but again crossing my fingers that it’ll be soon since the scripts already done.

Which leaves just the photography. I’ve already got several photo shoots edited which should be uploaded in the next week using the WordPress Slide Show plugin I designed. I wouldn’t mind shooting more during the year, particular themed shoots with costumes. I’ve always heard photographers make better filmmakers due to what’s learned with using the camera during the photo shoots. While photography isn’t what I’d like to solely focus on, I’ve definitely worked with some great models and would like to continue doing shoots between the rest of the things I’ve got planned.

It"s Been a Year...

Flawed Artists - The Power of Insecurity

Artists can be said to have many flaws. One of the greatest is sometimes said to be insecurity. It reminds me of a quote I’ve seen that pops up every now and again. It goes along the lines of stating that those who know the least speak the loudest, and those who are the most qualified keep quiet because they question themselves and the world. I think it may be safe to say that the more we learn about life, or our various pursuits, the more the wisest among us realize how little we actually know. This in turn leads to insecurity in life.

If we look at some of the greatest artists that have ever lived, many in their interviews mention their insecurities over their own work. Old interviews or memoirs of past film stars such as James Dean and Marilyn Monroe show a deep insecurity of their abilities. Some of the most talented writers, actors, and artists I’ve met always seem to think their work is terrible. Those artists I’ve met who talk about their brilliance or incredible talent leave me to wonder if they’re seeing something I’m not when I’ve watched what they’ve done. In most cases, not all but most, I’m left shaking my head wondering what type of inflated ego must possess them to think they are as talented as they seem to believe.

The sad fact I’ve read about most industries, both in the arts and other areas of life, is that confidence will help one achieve more than actual skill and talent. There was an actor turned casting director who wrote a book I had read several years back who had mentioned the same. Those who came in and gave terrible reads but held their heads high and pumped their fists at the end fared far better than those who gave moving auditions but chastised themselves at the end.

The most he could make of the situation was that the casting directors knew little of acting and based their casting decisions on the reaction of the actors when the audition was over. If the actor was excited it must have meant they did an amazing job. If the actor was tough on themselves it must mean they did something wrong. That was the thought process of the many casting directors he worked with.

While it’s sad that our reactions to our own work may weigh more heavily than the actual skill level of the work we do, I do believe that those who are insecure about their work possess the most potential and have a powerful tool in their hands. In life, it is those of us who are most insecure that will continue to strive to learn and improve. No matter what level we achieve we will always feel as if something is missing. As long as that feeling burns inside of us, as long as we continue to search for that missing piece to make us feel complete, improvement will come. That’s when great artists and great art are born.

It is those artists that feel as if they’ve mastered their craft with supreme talent, those that feel they may be a “gift from god” that will stagnate. These artists have achieved their best work, and there’s nothing more to come from them. What reason is there to strive for something more if one already feels like they’ve arrived?

It is that feeling of insecurity that is the most powerful tool one can possess, regardless of the struggles that may come with it. So take heed my insecure friends because it is you who will create art and achieve great things. It is each one of you who will do ten times what the over-confident cannot, that will bring substance to a world filled only with meaningless flare. That substance is what gets remembered for all time, where the rest merely get their 15 minutes.

Flawed Artists - The Power of Insecurity

Acting"s Like Great Sex

Yes, I said it. I also meant it. Acting is a lot like great sex and vice versa. I guess I could have said it’s also like being in the zone or having a runners high. I don’t think that headline would have gotten as much attention though. Regardless, all three are very similar when you’re “On”. It’s a complete feeling of freedom and yet an awareness. Time seems to fly by so quickly you may not even remember it. Most importantly, you’re completely immersed in the moment.

Since people seem to struggle more with acting than sex, let me explain it from the later point of view. It’s my belief that great sex happens when there’s very little thought. It could last for hours but you may barely remember it when it’s over. It’s not because it was forgettable, but because you weren’t thinking about it. You were in the moment. It’s like those moments when we’re enjoying something so much that time seems to fly by.

While great sex does involve a lack of thought or analyzing, there’s also an awareness that comes with it. We’re so in the moment that we may notice how a certain touch makes the other’s body quiver, or a kiss placed in a peculiar area draws a gasp of breath. We may play to that, tease and move away, only to come back to that spot later on. The catch is, it’s not preplanned. There’s no thought other than pleasuring the other person. Thinking about it too much only makes it unnatural and boring.

There’s no fear when you’re in that frame of mind. It’s merely playing and finding out what makes each other tick. It could be said that there’s a childlike curiosity to it. Fear, like thinking, causes an odd feeling that something’s off. You take yourself out of that moment and place yourself in your head. It’s a terrible state to be in for sex, just as it’s a terrible state to be in when performing on stage or in front of a camera. It could be said that great sex is about making yourself completely vulnerable to the other person, and them making themselves completely vulnerable to you. It’s a state of complete trust and playing off of one another.

Great acting is exactly the same. It deals with being aware of the person you’re on stage with. You breath in their words as they breath in yours. You both must be completely vulnerable to each other and trust each other as the scene plays out. Pre-planning how to say a line, or how to react, creates this odd feeling. It feels fake and off. It’s like watching someone fake an orgasm. You just know something’s not right, even if you’re not sure what it is. If this happens it means you didn’t prepare properly. It also means you’ve taken yourself out of the moment. You’re not allowing the other actor to affect you, and you’ve likely made it that much more difficult for yourself to affect them. It causes in instant wall to grow between the two actors.

Acting should be almost completely about the other person. How are you trying to affect the other person? During sex we may touch a certain spot to get a gasp. We don’t pre-plan it during great sex, we just get a feeling at some point that it feels right. We go with an urge. In acting we are trying to do the same thing. We are saying a line to get a reaction. We’re aware and studying how the other person reacts to that, and as they react back we allow that to affect us before returning it again. There is no point in time though that we pre-plan this. We are merely in the moment reacting and acting based off of what we are seeing and receiving. Acting is like a dance. In this case, it’s like a horizontal dance.

If you want to take your acting to another level then think of it like great sex. There’s no thought but there is an awareness. You should be lost in the moment. Play with the other person and try to get a reaction based off of how they’re responding to you. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, and trust that they too will do the same. Go with your urges without fear. Never, ever pre-plan how to say or do something unless you want to come across as a badly faked orgasm. When one learns to do this with their acting, I can almost guarantee they’ll reach a new level of truthfulness and realism to their performance. And if it don’t there’s always porn…

Acting"s Like Great Sex

Auditioning, Acting Tip

Auditioning can be a tough process. Standing out during your audition is an even bigger challenge. Yet most actors I know attack scenes in almost the same manner, basing their audition on the words on the piece of paper. If the scenes they’re auditioning for consist of two people arguing, they go right into yelling at the other actor. The best advice I’d ever gotten during training was that we should look at life when auditioning, and even after we get the part.

It’s been awhile since I’ve auditioned for anyone else since I’ve focused on writing my own films, or building up knowledge to implement the marketing that will be required to get it out there into the public eye. I did recently though find myself auditioning for a film, and I can use the sides we were given as an example of what I’m referring to about basing auditioning on the words on the paper. The audition was for a movie entitled Sin City Players being made by Michael Mahal. With the audition we were given several choices of sides.

Some of the sides had props within them. I haven’t seen too many auditions go well when someone mimes a prop. You can always ask if there’s an item in the room to use, in this case a cup, but I hate doing that just out of respect for the directors and not wanting to burden them. After narrowing the sides down based on if they had props and the characters in the scene, I chose the scene with a man sitting in a restaurant. In the scene a woman comes over and hits on him quite strongly, to which he rebuts her advances. As the scene ends, the women walks away, and then after a few moments returns as the man apologizes for being lousy at roleplaying the sexual advances of what was actually his wife and not a stranger.

From what I’ve seen in other auditions I’ve gone on in the past, or even playing these types of scenes in class, I think I can confidently say that most people attacked the scene by rebuking the advances completely. They probably read the scene as a guy saying, “No, don’t touch me. I love my wife.” while the women touched and flirted with him. The catch is, if one plays the scene that way the ending makes no sense. Argument scenes are no different. Everyone yells and wants to be the next Al Pacino, but even Al Pacino knows better. As my instructor use to say, when auditioning or reading a part, we should look to life.

If we think about this scene, we have to look at the ending, and how life plays into it. The words don’t matter as much as where the character is coming from. He’s attempting to roleplay with his wife. Obviously his protests of “No” aren’t really what he’s meaning because it’s roleplaying going on between the two of them. With the apology at the end, again we can maybe take that he’s somewhat awkward in the way the scene plays out. There’s conflict in the character. He’s saying one thing, but attempting another. The words don’t matter as much as the emotional state of the character. In this case he’s saying one thing, but the emotional state is likely meant to be a way to turn each other on in this game of theirs. The conflict itself will make the character more interesting to watch, much more so than completely trying to blow his wife off and then out of nowhere saying the opposite at the end.

So when attacking a scene like this it doesn’t make sense here, or even in life, for someone to be so strong in saying no. It makes much more sense for the character to want to touch back, maybe even doing so and awkwardly removing his hand. It makes sense for him to gaze at her fondly or with want, and then try to hide it in his lousy attempt at roleplaying. I can almost guarantee few people actually did that though if my past experiences are any indication of how people normally attack a scene.

The very same can be said for scenes that contain arguments for the auditioning. The casting directors are forced to hear 90% of those coming in yelling like Pacino and congratulating themselves on a great job. Likely what happens though is the casting director is tuning you out because you just did what almost every other actor auditioning attempted. It may be a great feeling as an actor when you can accomplish it, but is it true to the scene and the character? More importantly, is it interesting? Like Shrek, characters in our scenes are like onions. They have layers. The casting director has probably seen the same layer over and over throughout the day. Why not show him another layer to the character?

In life, not everyone yells in an argument. Some laugh and take jabs calmly with that underlying hate in their voice. Others may have long pauses, because they want to think of the words they’re about to say to do the most damage to the other character. While auditioning there may not be time to hit all those different levels, but it is possible to hit one or two. Once you have the part, an actor can start layering all those things into one based off of the character in the script. Think of how much more interesting you become when you argue differently than what every other actor has done before you, and you’re still staying true to your character but in a different way. When you walk into the door for an audition this is what you want to be thinking about. In essence, when auditioning try to look at the different ways people may do things in life. As a result your character is more likely to get someones attention.

Auditioning, Acting Tip

Directing Actors, a Film Tip

Directing actors is something that I consider to be a fine line that must be walked by a good director. There’s nothing that drives me more mad than the way I’ve seen some indie films work with actors and the manner they go about directing actors. I don’t know if filmmakers aren’t being taught about the proper way of directing actors in school or if the problem lies more with massive ego and control issues. What I do know is that I wish more directors would take the time to attend some acting classes by knowledgeable instructors, with an emphasize on knowledgeable. There are too many “acting” coaches today who teach how to look good on film, or how to get your best side shown on camera. This is not acting. I’d be surprised if very few of those who attend these types of acting classes ever get past community theatre or college plays.

Directing actors is an art form. It’s having control but also allowing the actor to express his own creativity. They should complement one another, or else you might as well have robots reading the lines back and forth. I was fortunate to train under someone who learned the craft of directing actors at Herbert Berghof Studios in New York back before “the look” became such a big thing in the industry, back when actors were truly actors. My instructor eventually moved on to be somewhat of a big agent in L.A., before retiring and training actors across the country based on Herbert Berghof’s vision of affordable classes. For those who are unaware, Berghof ran a non-profit and attending his classes were cheap. He believed that training people in the arts was more important than making money. Berghof worked with big names in the movie and theatre industry such as Uta Hagen, Al Pacino, William H. Macy, and Robert DeNiro just to name a few.

During my time in this instructors classes I would see students attending who had recently left “big name” instructors in town. These instructors trained actors in the same way many indie filmmakers go about directing actors. Their performances were stiff and lacked any connection to those in the scene with them. In other words, they were robots. It was sometimes said that we may just as well put a podium in front of them because anyone else in the scene didn’t matter. Depending on that actors talent it would take weeks or months to untrain all the bad habits they had been taught and to get them to connect to the person standing on stage with them. Once that was done though, their performances became mesmerizing to watch. They were no longer doing a scene, but were living in a time and place they had created around them.

The culprit in all of this was in their previous instructors telling them how to say a line, or instructing them to break down their lines in a way that they knew how they wanted each line delivered. Many indie film people do the same when directing actors. When watching it though it literally appears as if the actor was giving a speech on a podium. On their own they may have been interesting to listen to, but with another actor in the scene everything came out feeling and looking very rehearsed. Most indie film directors do just this. They instruct their actors on how they want the line said, or which words to emphasize. This is the death of an actor, and is sure to make everyone involved appear amateurish.

What indie film directors don’t seem to understand is that directing actors is similar to selecting shots. You may have a great idea for the framing of a shot in your head, but in actually shooting it there’s something not right about it. Sometimes it means scrapping the shot completely. It’s the same with actors. You may picture a line said in a specific way, but that normally doesn’t play out in the way the scene works.

In life, when people speak it comes from a certain place in the body and the way our mind interprets how we were addressed. The way we speak, and the tone we use, is also dependent upon the way we’re spoken too. If we’re trying to make a scene believable in its dialogue each actor is completely dependent upon the way the other speaks to him. We’re basically reacting to what we’re being given. When someone instructs an actor on how to say a line, no matter how great that line is delivered, there’s usually a tone that’s missing that normally happens when we respond to another person. It makes the line sound scripted or the actors sound off kilter, as if they’re not speaking to the other person at all. An example of this can be seen in the movie Napoleon Dynamite when the tater tots are crushed in his pocket during lunch. If you close your eyes and just listen to the dialogue it sounds completely off and unrealistic. It had me wondering if they were even in the same room together during the scene being shot.

The goal when directing actors is not to tell them how to say a line, or emphasize a word, but to help them get into the emotional state that the character finds himself in. Once you help an actor find that state then ego’s must be set aside to allow the actors to deliver the lines in a realistic manner because they are depending on each other, and completely dependent on how the actor across from him is addressing him in tone and emotion. This brings a scene to life, and makes the characters much more interesting to watch. It brings the audience into the story which is exactly what you want to achieve. The actors actually have a conversation instead of a line read.

If the actor is not able to achieve the emotional state on his own there are little tricks that can be done although I consider them a last resort. Elia Kazan was said to have pulled some of these when directing actors on his own sets. He did so with James Dean during the shooting of East of Eden. The anger Dean was expressing was not to Kazan’s liking so between takes he purposely became somewhat nasty with Dean in an attempt to anger him. The result was exactly what he was hoping Dean would achieve on-screen, with all the underlying anger as he threw ice down the chute. Personally I wouldn’t mind a director doing this to help me if I found myself struggling similarly, although some actors do not handle it well.

Regardless of the approach you take, when directing actors realize that getting the best performance out of them depends on how well you help them communicate to one another, and not on how you specifically want them to deliver a line. Your actors will appreciate it, and you’ll find a your films benefit from them due to better performances too. Directing actors is an art. Each gives up a small bit of control to get the best out of each other.

Directing Actors, a Film Tip